When children play a musical instrument, they’re not only learning notes and rhythms—they’re developing important social skills that help them connect with others in meaningful ways. Research shows that making music together improves communication, fosters cooperation, and creates a stronger sense of community. Over time, these experiences enhance children’s ability to form friendships and navigate social situations with confidence.
Below, we’ll explore how musical activities strengthen social bonds and provide simple, fun games you can play at home with your children.
Improved Communication Skills
Playing music in a group setting requires active listening and responsiveness. Musicians must pay close attention to one another’s cues, adjust their timing, and stay in sync. This constant back-and-forth strengthens the same communication skills children use in everyday conversations. Research by Gerry et al. (2012) found that even infants who participated in interactive music classes showed improved communication behaviors, such as increased eye contact and social engagement. [Read the study here]
Try This at Home:
Create a “musical conversation” game. Play a short rhythm or melody on an instrument or even just by clapping, and have your child respond by playing their own rhythm or melody. Continue this “conversation” by taking turns, gradually making the patterns more complex. This activity helps children practice listening carefully and responding thoughtfully—just like in a real conversation.
Strengthened Nonverbal Communication
In musical settings, children learn to read nonverbal cues such as gestures, eye movements, and subtle changes in dynamics. These skills carry over into everyday interactions, making children more perceptive of body language and tone of voice. As a result, they become better at understanding others’ feelings and intentions, even when words aren’t used. This form of nonverbal communication is a key part of building and maintaining strong peer relationships.
Try This at Home:
Play a “follow the conductor” game. Designate one person (you or your child) as the conductor, who will lead by moving their hand faster or slower, louder or softer. The other person must follow the cues without any words being spoken. Take turns leading and following. This game reinforces nonverbal communication skills and strengthens the ability to interpret others’ cues.
Collaboration and Cooperation
Making music together teaches children the importance of collaboration. Every member of a band, orchestra, or duet must work together to produce a harmonious result. This experience fosters a sense of teamwork and mutual respect. Rabinowitch, Cross, and Burnard (2013) found that children who participated in group music-making activities were more likely to demonstrate cooperative behaviors, such as helping and sharing, compared to children who did not. [Explore the study]
Try This at Home:
Have a family “jam session” where everyone plays an instrument—real or homemade—and tries to stay in sync. Pick a simple song and take turns being the leader who sets the tempo. This activity teaches children the value of working together and creates a fun, collaborative experience.
Boosted Confidence in Self-Expression
As children gain proficiency on their instrument, they become more confident in their ability to express themselves. This confidence often spills over into their social interactions, making them more comfortable initiating conversations, sharing ideas, and building relationships. Studies have shown that positive experiences in music lessons can increase self-esteem, which in turn helps children engage more fully with their peers.
Try This at Home:
Encourage your child to “teach” you a song they’ve learned. When children take on the role of instructor, they build confidence in their abilities and learn how to communicate their ideas clearly. Not only does this help them feel more secure in their skills, but it also strengthens your connection as you bond over the learning process.
Creating a Sense of Belonging
Music is a communal activity. Whether children are playing in a school band, a youth orchestra, or a family jam session, they develop a sense of belonging. This feeling of being part of something bigger helps children form meaningful social bonds. When they know their contributions matter, they become more comfortable building and maintaining friendships.
Try This at Home:
Start a weekly family music night. Each member of the family can choose a song or rhythm to play, or everyone can learn a simple piece together. As this becomes a regular tradition, your child will feel the sense of belonging that comes from being part of a supportive musical community.
Playing a musical instrument goes far beyond building technical skills—it helps children communicate more effectively, read nonverbal cues, collaborate with others, and feel a sense of connection and belonging. By trying out these fun, simple activities at home, you’ll not only nurture your child’s musical abilities but also help them build strong social bonds that will serve them throughout their lives.